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Just because I’m reviewing a children’s movie doesn’t mean there aren’t adult themes to be found in such films. For instance, Dreamworks thought the best idea to open up their new movie, Home, was to have aliens invade Earth and toss all humans into a concentration camp…an adorable concentration camp.

Allow me to clarify: see we have the Boov, a hyper technologically advanced alien race running away from the Gorg, an even more advanced alien race with spikes and tiny skulls on the spikes to let you know they’re evil. So the Boov’s cowardly leader, Captain Smeck (Steve Martin slumming it) moved the Boovs from planet to planet to escape the Gorg. Earth is the next stop and deeming humans to be stupid and docile, decides to abduct every human on Earth and put them in a happy little “camp” in the Australian desert…yes all 8.5 billion humans.

At which point the Boov move in the humans’ place and everything seems great for them (but not so much for the humans). Of course one Boov who is so DIFFERENT from the rest of his race wants to make friends and accidentally sends a house warming party invitation to the damn Gorg. Said Boov is Oh (as in “Oh shit, it’s you”) played by Jim Parsons (aka Sheldon from Big Bang Theory…doing his shtick from the Big Bang Theory). So Oh goes on the run after the Boov want to kill his dumb ass for letting their mortal enemy know where they are and runs into the only human not abducted, Tip (played by Rihanna, yes THAT Rihanna).

At which point the movie turns into a road trip flick with a flying car and tons of cutesy visuals all to find Tip’s mom, played by Jennifer Lopez (who, no shit, has ten lines in this whole movie). The visuals are very cute and colorful, but it still does little to engage anyone over the age of 9.

And that’s fine! But don’t make the mistake of thinking this is a family movie, which is in fact different from a kid’s movie. See the former is something anyone of any age can enjoy (unless your a psycho who can’t get it up if they don’t see at least two decapitations), whereas the latter only appeals ro kids below the age of 10. See the former is best because those are remembered fondly by kids into adulthood (your Disney Golden Age movies and other classics). But a kids movie is pretty forgettable for those over the age of 10.

And a kids movie this is, it’s very colorful with lots of safe and inocous jokes and little else. Parsons’ Sheldon shtick has been endearing for several people, but I have and continue to have found it grating all these years. And he does no favors for me in this movie by playing a socially clueless genius….so yeah, he’s basically Sheldon.

Rihanna is….well she’s not horrible. I guess they’re not putting that on that box quote. But she’s neither amazing or failing terribly. And it was nice to see a Barbados-born pre-teen girl as your main protagonist in a movie compared to what we usually get, but that’s still not enough to give this a glowing recommendation.

Nonetheless, the kids in my theater seemed to like it, so if you’re a parent looking for something color to entertain your kids for 90 minutes, you could do a hell of a lot worse than this. Gonna give this a…

RENTAL.

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